Silly Traditions & New Resolutions

Ten years ago, John and I rang in the new year/new decade on a snow-covered rooftop in Seoul. We took our dogs and two bottles of sparkling cider to the top of our apartment building and looked out across the skyline for fireworks. We couldn’t see any from our vantage point, but we laughed at our failed plan and enjoyed each other’s company anyway. As the clock struck midnight, we participated in our annual cider chug– a silly tradition started by my brother in the early 2000s. Each person cracks a bottle of sparkling cider or grape juice and races to drink their beverage first. The bottles had chilled in the snow, and when we started our chug, the icy glass containers made our lips numb while the carbonation burned our throats and bubbled up our noses. Tears streamed out the corners of our eyes as we laughed and sputtered and drank the sickly sweet drink. To the victor went the bragging rights and an entire evening of burping.

Ten years later and we still participate in the annual cider chug, only much slower and with Tums to aid in our digestive recovery.

A lot has changed in the last decade, more than our regular need for antacids. Since that time, we’ve moved to our fifth duty station, bought and sold cars and homes, and had four children. We’ve grown emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and physically [sigh]. There’s been the picking up of new habits, some good some bad. And we’ve expanded our limitations with every test, push, stretch, and strain. In short, as people are known to do, we’ve changed.

Occasionally, as a new year dawns, I attempt some resolutions. The goal is always to improve some aspect of myself. I’ve had varying success over the years. One year I resolved to cook meals regularly instead of eating pizza and picked up the habit of cooking three meals a week. It was a breakthrough year for me. Another year, I dedicated myself to a consistent workout routine, going to the gym at least four times a week; that was the year I fell in love with Crossfit. Other years I got sidetracked so quickly I was off on a rabbit trail within a month, and who knows what my resolution was.

Last year, I tried the word of the year concept and built more nebulous goals around the word abide. “If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you.” John 15:7. Abiding has allowed me to read through the Bible in a year, and cling to God’s word during a season that’s been more difficult than anticipated.

Looking forward to what’s ahead, the word I want to define my steps is ‘abandon.’ I want to abandon things that don’t have value. I want to leave behind guilt, concern over other people’s expectations, and following society’s arbitrary list of ‘should do’s’. I want to get rid of my pride, selfishness, and self-righteousness. Instead, I want to love with abandon; to love with action and in service to my family. I want to love others without my selfishness getting in the way; to love wholeheartedly, without expectation. I want to fight my introverted nature to connect with strangers and show them God’s love. I want to be generous without skepticism or fear. I want to love without self-imposed restraint.

Leave things behind that never needed to be carried in the first place, and love others well. That pretty much sums up my goal for the next ten years. I’ll screw it up a lot; I know that. If there’s one thing I’ve learned in the past decade, it’s that perfection isn’t a worthy goal, it’s a heavy weight. I want to abandon the pursuit of perfection and be content with progress. And as I abandon the unnecessary, I trust I’ll find the freedom to love well.

“If you continue in My word, then you are truly disciples of Mine; and you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free.” John 8:31b-32

Soon John and I will ring in another new decade together, bottles of sparkling cider in hand and Tums at the ready. I hope you’ll join me in abandoning some of the unnecessary weight you’ve been carrying around. And if you’re feeling up to it, drink some sparkling cider too. Cheers!