The Experience of Silence

Silence. Beautiful silence. A stillness that settles in. An opportunity for senses and mind to rest as the barrage of noise stops. Silence offers a respite from processing the TV in the background with the pounding of kids running through the house, along with the verbal cacophony of voices layered over top of each other. When the loudness fades away, the little things pop through, orchestrating a delicate symphony. The taps of rain hitting pavement and windowpanes, creating different sounds on each surface. The tick of a clock establishing a quiet tempo with each passing second. The distant whir of an HVAC system humming a melody. Silence settles in like a weighted blanket, welcoming, comforting to those of us whose ears are assaulted from sun up to sundown.

To those who are isolated, silence can be deafening, an echo chamber of loneliness. The tick of a clock can pound relentlessly with each second. The HVAC’s persistent whirring becomes an irritant, and the sounds emanating from the TV a poor substitute for companionship. The weight of silence can settle in with a stifling heaviness, constricting to those without the welcome noise of friends and family.

Strangely, silence has polar opposite perceptions. You won’t be surprised to find that my home is the noisy kind—the better part of the day, my senses process constant noise. Yelling, chatter, laughter, crying, whining, conversation, music, TV, dogs barking, and all manner of sound effects abound in a household with four adults, four kids, and four dogs. Now that we’ve been safe at home for over six weeks, those sounds quickly become overwhelming. When rare moments of silence descend, they fortify me. I soak them in, sitting in awe of their beauty.

My experience with silence is entirely different than someone who lives alone. In my home, it’s a welcome relief. But I remember how I felt almost a decade ago, pre-children, during my husband’s deployment. Silence was an unwelcome companion, a loud reminder of my loneliness. Silence is a universal experience individually experienced. Our environments, our mental state, our personalities impact how we perceive encounters with silence. The same is true during this time of nationwide lockdowns. Some have been able to welcome the change as a relief, a change of pace, an opportunity to reset. Others have experienced it as stifling, draining, and suffocating. Some of us have felt both ways during this time.

These lockdowns, like silence, have been welcomed and embraced by some but not by others. But kindness and grace are always welcome. Grace recognizes that everyone has a unique perspective and experience, and kindness offers to listen to it. Don’t let the sounds of your home, whether noise or silence, prevent you from hearing the voice of others.

“So, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience; bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you. Beyond all these things put on love, which is the perfect bond of unity. Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body, and be thankful.” Colossians 3:12-15