Crazy Trains & Time Wasters Part 2

February of last year I wrote a blog to remind my friends that despite how ‘together’ I may appear, appearances can be deceiving, and comparing yourself to another mom is a waste of time. Thanks to social media, I fear the myth that I’m a supermom has begun again. I appreciate the sentiment, but figure I should go ahead and set the record straight. We’re all in this motherhood thing together and we each have our own lists of successes and failures, no good can be found in guilt tripping ourselves that someone else does it better. So please don’t put me on a pedestal. If you do, I’ll just use it to reach the Peanut Butter Captain Crunch stored on top of the fridge and stress eat a gigantic bowl of sugary goodness. With almond milk though, because, you know, healthy choices. In no specific order, but in recent history, here are a list of things that I’ve done as a mom:

Buried my son’s poop at the beach. (To give myself some credit, I sprinted with him as far away as I possibly could for as long as he could hold it. Thanks Crossfit).

Went to Wal-Mart just to buy formula because I forgot Wonder Woman’s food while running errands. So, so many regrets dragging in 3 children just to buy one item. (Surprise ending, we left with more than one item.)

I spent at least a month giving the boys an Easter egg with candy in it every morning they got dressed, put on their shoes, and got in the car, because every young child needs a blast of sugar to start the day.

Yelled and shook my first in the air when I realized that the dog had eaten an absurd amount of diapers and left their remnants all over the nursery floor. Then I walked away because I didn’t have the mental fortitude to handle that mess.

I let Batman wear his pajamas in public, multiple days in a row. Some days you’ve just got no fight, and who am I to argue with the fabulousness and comfort of fleece PJ Mask pajamas, even if it is 80 degrees?

To get Batman dressed in the morning, I dig through a pile of clothes on the floor until I find appropriate wear (that he may or may not be willing to put on). Why? Because the day after I folded 4 baskets of kids’ clothes, the child pulled all of his out and dumped them on the floor.

I ate Tastykake mini powdered sugar donuts in front of my children and didn’t share. When I walked off to help their sister, the boys got into the donuts. Rookie mistake…

Discussed with my husband how long it had been since the baby had a bath, and realized that neither of us could remember. (I feel like I get to qualify this with two things. First, that my husband and I are so busy and tired we don’t have much of a memory for anything. Second, since writing this blog, my daughter got a stomach bug and received multiple baths because she kept throwing up on herself. I think it evens out.)

Oh, and Superman was late to preschool every single day for a week.

Ah yes, a day in the life. I was a hot mess mom before Wonder Woman entered our lives, and I continue to run on this crazy train. I might even be the conductor now, though that makes it sound like I’ve got more control over it than I actually do. I imagine it more like a runaway train, and I’m attempting to be the hero running across the top trying to get to the front and get control. Instead of being the Lone Ranger, I’m more like Russel from Up.

We’ve come a long way in a year. In some ways I do think I’m a better mom than I was this time last year. In some ways, I think I’m worse for the wear. But it’s alright, or at least it is what it is. I have a husband that loves and supports me, children who love me despite being stuck with me all day every day, and a God who unconditionally loves me despite my flaws and the fact that I might be as stubborn as the toddler I live with.

I think that’s one of the things that floors me most. God put me in this season of my life on purpose. There are so many days I feel like I’m failing my family. Too many times that I overreact about the production that is getting shoes on little boys, too many times that I lose my cool in the nightly whack-a-mole routine (aka, getting 3 kids to go to sleep), too many times that I’m just plum tired and hangry because feeding 3 kids AND myself is nearly impossible. There are days that the majority of my time is spent dealing with poop and wondering, how is this even possible? But God wanted me here. He wanted me to be the mom of the amazing boys who inspire me and encourage me even more than they drive me crazy. He wanted me to be the mom of this beautiful and perfect little girl who wears me out and then gives me perfect moments that I want to hang onto forever. He knew how I would react, how I would fail, how I would persevere, and all of the crazy parts in between, and He still picked me to be on this journey. With Him and His strength, I get to parent these amazing children.

I’ve been hanging on to the verse, “I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made” Psalm 139:14 in reference to my daughter. But it applies to me too. Yes, I make mistakes. I’m a hot mess sometimes, but I’m fearfully and wonderfully made by the creator of the universe. He loves me. And guess what, I’m not special. Or rather, I’m just as special as you. How different would our families be if we embraced this fact? I make far more mistakes than I want to, but I know that I am loved, I am special, and I am living my purpose as mom to these beautiful children on the good days, the bad days, and all the poop filled ones in between.

The LORD is compassionate and gracious, Slow to anger and abounding in lovingkindness. Psalm 103:8

Now may the God who gives perseverance and encouragement grant you to be of the same mind with one another according to Christ Jesus Romans 15:5